The waves in my mind have been calm for the most part, gently rocking me as I relax on my back, enjoying the warm sun kissing my skin. I hear seagulls passing by and smell salt in the air.
I am all alone, but I am glad.
I try not to think about the storm that I know will eventually come my way, but today is not the day to worry about what is not now. These storms will always come back, the depression will kick in, and I will find myself kicking to keep my head afloat from the tall waves crashing down on me, but I will stand strong and face the storms. My loved ones are my boat, and the Lord is my life jacket because He alone can handle the harsh, relentless waves. He is not bothered by turbulence or storms. He is my stability.
I am not afraid.
So, today, I will be. I will silence the voice in my head whispering, “The storms will be back, you know,” and enjoy the here and now as I float in my sea of happiness.
I am the queen of black-and-white thinking, but I wasn’t always this way. I wasn’t always the worst case scenario expert, and I used to be a lot more optimistic than I am. Then I became a social worker. I am kidding but not completely kidding. Working with people did have a big impact, I […]
Has your environment ever been disrupted to the point to where you feel misplaced? My home office has been getting remodeled with a much needed face lift, but in the mean time, I don’t really have a place to write or just take my required alone time as a dedicated introvert. I need that time […]
I feel like I have been stuck in a rut here lately. Nothing exciting or life-changing has happened. Nothing severely unfortunate has happened (thank God!). I feel like I am just spinning my wheels. I feel like I am in this awkward phase of just going through a really, really long tunnel. I feel like […]
I have been sick with one thing or another since Thanksgiving. From tummy woes to scratchy throat and an annoying cough, seems I have been plagued. I feel so unprepared for the New Year 2019, as I sit here and drink my peach bubbly at 7pm because there is no way this girl will be […]
Since I hit the big 3-0 this year and we’re approaching 2019, I thought I would take some time to reflect on this year and share some things I have learned. These are in no particular order or significance. I hope you can relate and share your own! I would love to hear your story […]
A few weeks ago, my husband surprised me with one of these ancestryDNA kits as an early Christmas present. You may think I am cheesy, but I am excited! I have been meaning to do it for a few weeks now, but I have allowed life to get in the way. It has been a […]
I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving! I went down to my sister’s and stayed the night and had a Thanksgiving lunch with her and my Dad and his wife, and then I stayed the night with my best friend (aka, my wifey) and we hung out on Black Friday. Anyway, when I was at […]
The older I get, the more complicated life seems to get. I think it can be even more difficult sometimes when you’re a die-hard black-or-white thinker. I will openly admit that my self-esteem has never been at elevated levels, and I don’t want to put myself down more than what life has already dished at […]
Some days are definitely better than others. I feel I definitely earn my gold star adulting stickers and then other days… What happened? On the days that are not so good—from general anxiety to stress to being hangry (which is very real, trust me) and everything in between—social interactions can be a big struggle for […]