Has your environment ever been disrupted to the point to where you feel misplaced?
My home office has been getting remodeled with a much needed face lift, but in the mean time, I don’t really have a place to write or just take my required alone time as a dedicated introvert. I need that time alone, and it isn’t against anyone or anything. I feel so out of place that I about can’t stand it. It’s almost like I feel off balance, like my equilibrium is off. I am not in homeostasis. It makes me a little anxious. I even haven’t been running. I don’t want to say I feel a little blue, but I kind of do. Not having my writing space has disrupted my routine in some ways, and I am a person who thrives with and has to stick to a routine.
I feel misplaced.
It is amazing how powerful our environments can be on our moods and outlook. I get an “itch” this time of year, and I am so ready for winter to be over. I have had enough of the dead grass and trees. The weather has been mild for the most part, and I am tired of not feeling or seeing the sunshine a whole lot. I love early spring, and I wanted to think of early spring every time I went into my office, so my husband and I painted my office as a beautiful spring green (the color is actually called fruit basket) and I smile every time I walk in there, even though it is still a wreck. He built me a nice corner desk, and we got a beautiful floral rug for the new hardwood floors. It is so much more cheerful than the tan walls and tan carpet that was in there.
But it isn’t quite ready yet, and I feel misplaced.
I keep telling myself to hang in and it will be worth it. I am hoping it will help me in the creative department, as I have been struggling to find my literary voice here lately. Maybe because my space is out of order for the time being? I am not sure. I will keep reflecting on that.
There are just not enough hours in the day!